Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Supporting Differences

How do you show support for different interests in a relationship?
There's a simple equation to follow when you are confronted with your partner's hobby or passion that isn't quite your cup of tea.  Take my fiance J, for example:
J loves basketball.  And I love J.  Therefore, I must at least like basketball.
Or tolerate it, respect it, support it.

I’m not advocating that we should all conform ourselves to the likeness of our partners.  Shared interests should come from a genuine place, not a forced one.  All of our friends and family know how different J & I are from each other.  J is the athlete, the practical, pragmatic, and simple one.  Whereas, I am drastically the opposite – the dreamer, the dramatic, and impulsive one.  Our differences balance each other and our relationship thrives on it! 

What I’m proposing is that in order to fully appreciate and accept our relationship’s differences, there is a need to support what makes the other person happy – even if it’s one that we don’t share.  It’s about supporting our partner’s happiness because that happiness is intricately to our own and eventually, the well being of the overall relationship. 

This relationship cause & effect prove my point:

J loves basketball > Pauline loves J > supports J in basketball > J is happy playing basketball > J comes home happy and decides to take Pauline out on a date > Pauline loves spontaneous dates > Pauline is VERY HAPPY.

Much of my Sunday evenings for the past couple of months were spent attending J’s basketball league games.  Even though I could have spent that time working on other projects (my weekend time is precious time), I wanted to truly show my support for J.  That simple act was really enough for him, especially when there were only a couple of other girlfriends who came consistently. While my knowledge of basketball is limited to just “putting the ball through the basket”, I’m there to whoop and holler on that bench to show my man that I’m cheering him on!  Sure, I also yell embarrassing things like “GOoooo Sexy #6!”, though inside he feels the love and support anyway.  

J (#6) about to do a throw down
What are your partner’s interests that mystify you, but you support anyway?


  1. cars. motorcycles. doing projects. it's seriously endless. I love this post, and not because I love U and J :D

  2. I just wanted to add... that is a very sexy picture of #6!

  3. Thanks for YOUR support, D! Now, are the projects related to the cars and motorcycles?

    Twin, you'll probably get to see that same pose sometime soon. Please come and visit us!

  4. Go sexy #6! Good post, i like it!

  5. Thanks Tri! He is quite sexy, isn't he?

  6. Why is J posing like someone's guarding him? No one's around within a mile... lol, you can tell him I said it.


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