Throughout our year of living together as fiances, a few discoveries popped up along the way. There are the little ones, such as the fact that J obsesses over an empty kitchen sink, how I can’t eat leftovers more than twice whereas he can have the same meal five days in a row, that I truly enjoy cooking for him, how frequently he hears me burp throughout the day, that J enjoys drinking carrot juice, and how our sleeping patterns are complete opposites. So far his night owl’s habits have been winning as I indulge in his late night TV, web surfing, or online streamed episodes of Naruto.
Then there are the surprising moments of simple joy. When I’m the first to leave for work in the morning, I drop a kiss on his forehead. Instead of the lingering pang that comes because I may not see him for a few days - how I used to feel when we dated in Los Angeles - I am comforted that I’ll see him later that evening. We make it a point to affectionately greet each other at the door when someone comes home. I missed doing that once and J was not happy. I don’t care for naps, whereas J loves them, but I admit that there is something incredibly cozy and serene about falling asleep on the couch together. Especially on a lazy weekend when you sleep to the sounds of the breeze rustling the trees. Or the time when we celebrated our first Christmas at home and created a faux fireplace by hooking the laptop to the TV, the YouTube burning log channel on repeat. With my head resting on his shoulder, I could happily pretend that we were in our own winter retreat in front of a fireplace – even if it was a web version.
I was also surprised at how little we fought. You would think co-habitating immediately spotlights the other person’s every pet peeve imaginable. Actually, it does. Though it helps A LOT when you call the person out on those actions before it becomes a habit. Minor annoyances aside, I can count only 3 or so major fights that occurred. 3 fights:365 days is an incredible relationship ratio.
The fights were memorable and also ridiculous. The first one involved us storming out of a ramen shop we had driven 40 minutes to eat at, only to wind up trying out a new Indian restaurant a couple of hours later. Even angry people get hungry. The second was an insensitive joke that I made while we stood along the windy Golden Gate Bridge for me to take pictures. Apparently, J didn’t find it very funny. Maybe I need to work on my delivery. That photo is now framed in our living room as a teasing reminder. The third fight happened during the holiday season when J came home grouchy from work. I thought he was mad at me, so then I got mad, which made him get mad at me for being mad. You know how that goes.
Whether it’s silly, petty, or small joyful discoveries, truthfully, I’m having fun. Even after dating for 6 years, it’s nice to know that the surprises still keep on coming. Cheers to a wonderful engaged year of random findings, simple moments, and ridiculous fights! I can’t wait to experience more with you, J.
And yes, I’m very happy that you planned out a special date for us to celebrate this occasion.
